There is no situation in which assault will ever be justified or okay.
Recently, a 25-year-old woman from KL decided to share with WORLD OF BUZZ the story of how her blind biological father got away with sexually assaulting her throughout her childhood because of his disability. The woman, who will be anonymously referred to as A, said her abuser began the sickening acts when she was still very young.
“My mom taught me to never let anyone else touch me where they’re not supposed to, which is my chest and my privates. She told me that a lot of times, but I didn’t know why she thought about those things at such an early age.”
“That man always grabbed my boobs and pinch my nipples. He would ask me if he could touch me down there but even if I answered no, he would touch me anyway, with or without clothes.”
While A‘s mother knew about the assault, she could do little to stop him as she too was blind and “got beaten up every day and night” by her husband. During this time, the assaulter, referred to by A as Mr.Lee, was also physically and psychologically tormenting her three siblings.
Growing up in a violent household, A said there were times where her neighbours would call the police, “my house was always loud: a lot of shouting, screaming, violence and so on. When the police came, I told them that I was being touched inappropriately by that man. But they did nothing.”
A said her assaulter always had a way to convince the police that it wasn’t his fault. “He said things like, “I did not do it”, “my family did not respect me”. He even claimed that his victims were “imagining things”. No matter how many times the police came, Mr.Lee somehow always managed to use his disability as an excuse to start a pity party in front of the authorities.
“That man is a narcissist. Whenever the police came, he’d turn the story around. He’s blind so of course the police believed his story,” said the victim.
A admits that she eventually started to lose hope once she discovered that the police wouldn’t help them, “I was already mentally unstable and depressed.” As her mother was a full-time housewife and all her other relatives are in Penang, there was no way for her to escape the abusive household.
While the sexual assault eventually stopped when the victim became a teenager, the emotional abuse never did. “At a very young age, I was no longer an innocent child.”
A now only refers to her abusive father as “Mr.Lee”. She told WORLD OF BUZZ, “To those people who think I’m rude for calling my abuser by his name instead of “papa/daddy”… Don’t ever tell me to respect my abuser. He doesn’t deserve my respect.”
It doesn’t matter who your abuser is, you always have every right to protect yourself.
Till this day, A is still living in that household, but hopes to get out once she finishes her last semester in university.
If you know anyone who’s in an abusive household, reach out to help them get the assistance they need. You can also visit Women’s Aid Organisation to book a face-to-face consultation or for more information about help offered to households with domestic violence.
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