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You’re Not A Loser or Lonely For Doing Things By Yourself, Here’s Why It’s Okay To Do Things Alone



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I remember walking past a cafe with a friend and we saw an acquaintance of ours by herself eating lunch alone. Upon seeing that, my friend said: “Eh, that looks so lonely, no one should eat by themselves like that”.

At that moment, something occurred to me, “Why is that lonely?”.


The Stigma of Doing Things By Yourself 

Socialising is how we forge relationships with others and help each other grow. As human beings, it’s literally in our DNA to socialise with others and grow in a community.

Social media has got us thinking that doing things alone is social suicide, that you’re a ‘loser’ if you do things by yourself. It surprises me how many people actually have thoughts like that. Activities such as watching movies or shopping or even dining are usually viewed as social activities that you do with others but who’s to say you cannot enjoy them alone?

We also tend to project our own tendencies onto people around us, especially in negative situations. People who reject doing things by themselves tend to be people who cannot be alone with their thoughts for many reasons. Think about it this way, if you can’t enjoy your own company, you can’t expect others to enjoy it as well.


Benefits Of Doing Things Alone

When one says “me” time, the first thing that pops into your head would be staying home all day, binging on snacks and watching your favourite shows. “Me” time can also be going outside, go shopping or chilling in a cafe. The chance to be by yourself in a busy world is a “privilege” of some sort. So here are some benefits of doing things alone;


1.You get to do things at your own pace

When you go out with people, you would tend to do things at their pace. Let’s say when you and your friends go shopping, they are taking their own sweet time in a shop that disinterests you and you just want to shop at other stores. The polite thing to do is to wait for them to shop together at another store. BUT if you are going solo, you can just jump around from store to store at a more relaxed pace and take your own time without worrying that you making others wait or feel rushed.


2. You start to love yourself more 

The thought of doing things alone can be scary at first but once you start getting used to it, it can be empowering. You can practice independence and when you accomplished something you will feel proud of yourself because you did it ALL. BY. YOURSELF.


3.You will be okay when loneliness strikes 

There are times where doing things alone is unavoidable because it’s part of life especially now that we are in a pandemic. It’s important to learn to be comfortable with yourself hence by practising this, you can be less fearful and more adept to lonelier moments.

As someone who likes doing things herself, there’s nothing wrong doing group activities solo style. And let’s be real, sometimes people are just plain disappointing. Personal image and popularity would only last you so long. After all of when it all fades away, you will only be left with your inner self. As long as you are happy about your own decisions, you will live a fulfilling life. Do it for yourself.


Also read: Lonely But Lazy? Here Are 5 Dating Tips That Are Perfect For You


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